What's UP?

Not like what's happening, what's up but rather, what's positive? What is up as opposed to down? I don't know about you but, I'm not in the mood any more for being negative. It sort of gets drilled into us. Be negative. Be pessimistic. Whatever you do, don't be cheerful or upbeat. What's wrong with you?

You have a choice. Times can be tough. Times can be absolutely terrible. Losing your house? That's really bad. Losing your job. That can be downright devastating, because if you haven't done so yet, you will lose your house too. STOP! We get trapped in the cycle of negativity. Something not good happens and we dwell on it over and over. We tell our friends how terrible things are. They tell you back how terrible your situation is. You're just circling the drain at an alarmingly accelerating rate. The blackness is reaching up and pulling you in! What's left? I'd like to offer a twist to the plot.

Bring down your expectations. Reel in your expectations. The world isn't going to flick you off like some unwanted insect that's causing an annoying itch. Relax. Even though it feels like the last thing you want to do...maybe the last thing you think you should be doing. Relax and think through what you've got. I say you've got at least two things. You have the ability to make a choice about what to do next and you have tomorrow. Don't let the memory of what was, keep you from taking stock of what is and moving forward from that point. It's cliche. It's easier to say than to do.

I had a couple of pivotal revelation points in my life. One came when Michael Jordan made a comment that's since become pretty often referenced. He talked about how he kept practicing a particular shot even though he kept missing it. Even though he was missing the shot, he was learning from each attempt. He said after about 1000 practice shots, he finally started making them. Later on, a journalist asked him if he regretted all the time he wasted before he started making the shot he was practicing. Jordan's response was something along the lines of, you don't start succeeding at attempt 1001 unless you do the 1000 "learning" steps first. So, basically, every unsuccessful result is only defeat if you let it beat you. What you should do is get back up and learn how to improve the next attempt. As long as you don't settle for failure, you haven't failed. Life is a process that keeps on going.

The other revelation came in two parts from reading The Art of Happiness by Dalai Lama. He said you can whittle down everybody's life's goal to achieving happiness. Once you clear away the "noise" of what you want to achieve, you can begin to get there. The other point I got from Dalai Lama is, you can live life two ways. You can let life happen TO you or you can make the choices of how to live your life. It's hard to explain/understand until you start doing it and seeing/feeling it happen but, it is true. It works and it makes sense. You want to take responsibilty for your life. You want to make the decisions about how your life is going to be. So, it's like this. You lose your job, your house, your spouse, whatever. Are you going to just stop and say, oh my, what's going to happen to me now. Or, will you pick yourself up and go from there. You may feel compelled to argue that you don't have any money, a roof over your head,etc. Or, instead of dwelling on what you don't have, what you had, you start using the two things you have. Remember? You have tomorrow and you have the ability to choose. It may not seem like much but, it's all you've ever really had, isn't it. All the wealth, all the things. What are they. They are a result of choices. You've always had it and still do, no matter the circumstances. And tomorrow, well, that's just another word for hope, isn't it. By moving towards tomorrow, you free yourself from having to live with past results. You start to get closer to 1001, when you start making the shot.

To sum it up, there are three keys: You'll reach your goal when you learn how. Make choices that lead to your happiness. Take control of your life and the things that happen in it. These may not sound like much but, they're everything. They're what everything is built on and grows from.

Go for it!